||[May. 13th, 2009|04:01 pm]
Having re-read most of my recent posts, they're all bitching about my lack of sex partner, so enough of that. I want to start writing about sex again, and maybe the universe will drop some sex in my lap (pun intended).
So, I've been asked by a number of people about anal sex, why I like it so much, and would I ever want it to the exclusion of regular sex.
The answer is yes. I've talked about this before here and here but I feel it bears repeating. Not to mention that some of these posts are 5 years old, and bear reviewing.
I can't claim to have made an early start into anal sex. I was dating someone who wanted to try it, and I did, and it was disappointing. It pretty much came off the menu after that. Later on, with a different partner, when I started exploring BDSM in all its various permutations, anal sex deserved a revisiting. With the help of good toys, lots of lube, and an enthusiastic partner, my subsequent anal experiences definitely made up for previous failure.
One of the first things I fell in love with about anal is the taboo. I've always been drawn towards things that I'm not supposed to like. I met plenty of girls who think that blowjobs are for special occasions only, and sex should be used as a weapon to get what you want, so no one I knew was into anal sex at all. So it was amazing for me to be able to have a rough anal session and then go to work the next day with a sore ass and a huge grin. I would love to ask co-workers about their day, and while they were at home with a DVD, I was getting a huge cock shoved up my ass. It made me smile... it still does.
Girls aren't supposed to like anal sex. They're supposed to grudgingly try it once for a boyfriend, then retire their ass forever. Seriously, most of the erotica I've found on anal describes a man pretty much begging his wife for anal once in their 10-year relationship. It's sad, really. From my perspective, even if anal didn't give me mind-blowing orgasms, I think I would still enjoy it because of the extreme taboo.
Anal sex is (for lack of better term) a labour of love. Stretching, relaxation, lube, it's all part of a planned and deliberate effort. If you're not into it, or working to make it happen, it just won't.
I remember the first time I fucked a stranger. The sex was good, but the thing that got me off the most was sitting there thinking "holy shit, this guy is fucking me and I don't even know his name." Game me orgasms that made my head hurt... it still does. Anal is the same way. The taboo of doing something that's widely considered incredibly depraved is fantastic.
To quote John Stagliano, pussies are bullshit. You watch enough porn and you realize how fake it all is. Lube, makeup, and stage lighting. The only chest flush you'll see is on amateur porn. The boobs are fake, the lube is fake, and the orgasms are fake. Anal sex is the only time when you see genuine emotion. Rocco is my fave for this. The girls he sodomizes he isn't gentle with. You can see the struggle and pain in their faces as he pushes into their asses. I have a clip from a Rocco film where the girl has this scared look on her face, and Rocco is slowly sodomizing her. The sodomy doesn't get me off, but the look on her face does, every time. It's probably my favourite porn movie of all time.
With anal sex, you get the feeling of being exceedingly present, in the moment, and focused on your partner. The feeling of a cock in your ass also feels really exaggerated; everything feels way bigger. You have to stay focused on relaxing, which focuses your attention on the act itself, how degrading it is, and that makes it hotter.
Honestly, fuck my ass and I will drop into subspace like a boulder in a well. You might as well have a sign saying "you're a slut" tattooed on your forehead, and every minute that it's going on, you feel more and more depraved.
In addition to all that, and in case that wasn't enough, there's the feeling of being extremely vulnerable. Positioning alone to be able to do anal puts you in an extremely vulnerable position, not to mention having to physically open yourself into a very sensitive, delicate and vulnerable area.
So, if you add all of that together, and factor in that I regularly have anal orgasms, is it any surprise why I would want it all the time? The only challenge with this is for it to be regular, it has to be frequent. You have to be stretched often or you lose the flexibility. I would love to have a frequent anal partner to the point I can do an anal quickie, or do it without lube (yes, this can be done safely, I'm not dumb). I think this would be incredibly hot.